Do you remember that teacher who would yell and scream at the whole class for seemingly nothing? Remember when they went in the hall and screamed? Remember when they told you they really weren't paid enough?(a subject that should never ever be mentioned in front of students) I always thought that teacher was crazy, now I realize she probably was driven to such craziness by her naive notion that teaching is about changing lives.
I know this isn't a very uplifting perspective and honestly I feel like I am two completely different teachers. In the afternoon, I am that wonderful happy teacher that every student loves. I love my students and have fun with them. I believe I am changing lives and helping children realize their potential.
In the morning everything is different. I am anxious the whole time. I can't close my eyes for one second for fear that my classroom will be ripped apart. I am so strict that I think I would have hated me as a kindergarten teacher. You may be wondering what the difference is: behavior.
At BYU I was taught that every child is a son/daughter of God and that no matter what they do, you have to find a way to handle it. I was told that all discipline should be positive and that you should only rely on intrinsic (doing the right thing because you know it is right) motivation. My question to the world is how on earth am I supposed to do this when my students are too busy being disruptive to care what I have to teach them?
I love my job, and I can honestly say that I love each of my students. I want to be the happy teacher that all the children adore all day, not just in the afternoon. I suppose Heavenly Father gives us trials to make us stronger. I feel like people who have been teachers are the strongest out there.
I am grateful to all my teachers who put up with classrooms full of students eager to learn as well as students eager to disrupt.
Next time you see a teacher, say thank you, I know I will.
Summer-part 2
1 month ago
I experience a similar thing with my nephews. I've been watching them for the last couple of weeks almost full time and for the last week they've been treating me to a 5AM wake up call. It's so hard to be happy and fun and positive when you look at the clock and realize it's only 8:30 and you've already been at it for four hours. It's gotten to the point where I can actually hear myself arguing with a 4 year old and I think, "What are you doing?!" I also hate the sound of my voice when it gets to that point.
ReplyDeleteI think it's just a part of being an influence on young children. I was told once that it can be good when a child acts out at home because it means he's totally comfortable in that situation and trusts that even if he does misbehave to major proportions, he will still be loved. That's not so comforting when he's throwing a giant fit...but maybe a little after the fact. haha.
So keep it up. It will get better over time, with experience. You are doing great things! You are just a part of a profession where you may not ever find out how you influenced a specific child...but I am sure you are doing fabulous. :)
Dear Jennie, It's been many years since I helped out in a classroom, but I still have very vivid memories of both kinds of classes like you mention above. I was always amazed at the teachers and their different approaches and changing strategies to deal with the class they were "dealt". I have nothing but admiration for those who choose to teach--you really put yourself on the line every day, often in stressful situations, and even when you know you had a fantastic day, there's no one to see and acknowledge your efforts. You have to know that there are so many grateful parents and kids who love the job you are doing and will remember Mrs. Peterson very fondly. I firmly believe that you do have to be a different teacher for your different classes--I'm sorry the morning group seems to give you difficult times. And I wholeheartedly agree with your final statement--"Say thank you, the next time we see a teacher!" I will too! Love, mom p
ReplyDeleteMaybe it will help if you take it out on us! Rant and rave and call them horrible names on here, and then maybe you'll have more patience with them in the classroom. :P
ReplyDeleteHonestly, though, if a kid is rotten in class it's probably because he's not having a good time at home, or his parents aren't a good influence. It's incredible (and incredibly sad) how often things can be going on even in a family where everything seems perfect. Trying to remember that can help when you find yourself getting mad at them. (It's the same with adults... if people are really big jerks, it's usually because they had awful childhoods, and feeling sad for them can help you not hate them.)
Thank you all so much! And I agree ranting and raving really does help, poor Sean. It is sad to realize all the horrible things some kids have had to go through:(
ReplyDelete